Translation? ... I have to do one more today

What I have most fun while writing my posts is reading the Czech version translated by "Powered by Google Translate". 

I am always very impatient what comes out after I click on magic 'select language'. Believe me, I am never disappointed. I did not know how much fun is to be an interpreter. The text is translated by somebody - let's call HIM 'Robot Capek'. Him is very important, I will explain later. I am still not sure whether I like or hate Robot Capek.

First I have to say - I am really sorry for English native speakers. Unless they speak Czech, they are missing one of the funniest parts of my post. After clicking 'select language' I always wonder what was really on my mind. 

Second, and now I come to why is Robot Capek HIM, I tried hard, but I am in Czech version of each post always male. My mother wondered who am I talking about (it is me mom, but I look just a little manly). Now I understand better the 'feminist hysteria'. When we talk about English native women most of the time as a male, they may feel offended. I am suddenly happier about the fact we can differentiate female and male in Czech language just by family name and even by the verb form. 

Back to Robot Capek, I decided to like him. He is doing his best to help my Czech, German and other non-English friends to understand. I am not sure whether they understand better, but at least they have fun. Herewith I want to ask you for your comment on your native language version. 

Introspection comment - yes! I know my English is not perfect, but still ... it is not as funny as the Czech version of any English text.

PS ... for non-Czech - Karel Capek, Czech writer, author of the word ROBOT. More here http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R.U.R.

I am curious, Robot Capek, how you handle this post?!? Let's have fun!